Hello, everybody, and there's a few people still coming in, today. And, so I'll just take my time before we go on to the first one, but it's lovely to, be on board with you all again tonight and 3 more weeks of lockdown ahead and so bearing that in mind, I thought, you know, the moment now the slide says the moment is now to use your mind for muscle and boy is that, is that true, you know, I'm finding it's, it's helping me get through this. So I'm actually increased my meditation.

Practise and I'm doing quite a lot of yoga as well. And the two combined are meaning that, I'm, I'm actually doing OK, and particularly because my, daughter, hi Katriona from a cold but beautifully sunny Argyle share. And Jose, hi, Jose, lovely to have, it's lovely people saying hello actually.

It's just, just great. And there's Dawn as well. And, Yeah, so my daughter arrived back from New Zealand with boyfriend in tow and they're locked down with us because they're in sort of two weeks quarantine.

And, so I've kind of, Thought use some of the experiences that we're going through, and other people are going through. So on my Tuesday, I've gone back into the NHS back to run clinics there, fully, Got all the PPE, so, which seems rare, but I have, I've got everything. So doing therapy with advisor is, is a new experience, but being mindful also is, is taking us through.

And so one of the things that I've come across as being, as, as a particular sort of stressor at the moment is, this whole issue of interpersonal mindfulness. And we're spending, it feels much more time either, if we're living alone, in just in our own company. And so, A webinar so meditation 2 tonight is very much aimed at Just how we sit and manage difficult emotions in a very mindful, accepting way and stop those difficult emotions from really toxifying our, our sort of presence really and our ability to just sit and like like ourselves.

But this first issue I thought I would just share with you is just some thoughts really about how we might get through. The difficult communications that I'm sure you're beginning to have and I'm imagining that as people working in the veterinary profession you're having to deal with very stressed owners of pets, very stressed farmers, very stressed customers, and who are sort of owning their stress sometimes as though they were the people, the only people experiencing it. And sometimes I think it's a, a time for us to be really mindfully aware of where we are emotionally during some of those, Consultations, confrontations, and I think the one of the, the, the, the best strategies that I advocate in therapy is this, I think I understand.

Or if we're being absolutely honest sometimes, you know, I'm not sure I completely understand what what you're saying and what seems to be happening here, but if we do, do you know, I, I think I do understand where you're coming from and to meet people with empathy and to be mindful of their need for an empathic response. At a time of such incredible difficulty is really important. And even if we're feeling up to our sort of gills with stress and anxiety and tiredness.

Taking the effort to meet. Confrontation meet interpersonal difficulty always first of all, with an attempt at honest empathy. So, and what, what seems to really work is this sort of triumvirate of process.

And I think I understand this is how I feel, and do you know what, this is what I'd like going forward. And so we start with the empathy of either I don't understand, you know, I'm not sure I understand, but I'd love to, or yeah, I think I understand. Just how you're feeling.

And I've had a couple of occasions with that with my, 25 year old daughter and boyfriend back kind of, In our home And having to, you know, I do understand how frustrating it is for you to come back to this country. Without a job, being locked down, and being used to your own company and now having to sort of live in dad's house with dad and mum's, very relaxed rules. I, I, I get it.

This is how I'm feeling though. So step one is empathy. Step 2 is absolute, just.

Honest, honest, honest, you know, telling people how we feel and mindfully watching and being aware of whether or not they're actually hearing us, you know. So I think I understand, this is how I'm feeling. And then the honesty of assertiveness.

This is what I'd like going forward. And not being afraid, I think, to tell people what you'd like and to be assertive, but assertiveness is an awful lot easier if we've prefaced it with a little bit of empathy, followed up with. Just, just honesty and then using that empathy and that honesty as a springboard for going into what we, I think is so important at a time like this when we don't want miscommunications because that's the cause of so much disharmony in relationships, isn't it?

Straight then into, do you know what, this is what I'd like, and then. Getting us through So I thought I would share that with you tonight because it's the form of mindful communication that I think works. Very, very well.

And Being in the moment with people truly, honestly, deliberately on purpose trying to communicate with them using empathy, honesty, and assertiveness is going to mean, I think, that we get through this torrid torrid period without losing. Too many relationships without too much confrontation with the people we love without Getting into torturous exchanges professionally as well. So I don't know.

I just thought I would share that with you tonight. And if I, I hope you'll, you know, go with me. I just think it was, it felt like a really important, I know it's not a meditation, but the second meditation tonight is, is a long one, and what I'm going to do is record it.

Because this is the meditation I thought we would work with tonight, and it's, a meditation on, on, on difficult emotion. And I felt that this was massively appropriate. Because I think we're all experiencing difficult emotion of disbelief is an emotion.

That I'm doing these webinars at the moment, some friends. With the frontline NHS staff, and we do 40 minutes and then a 20 minute Q&A, and they're the busiest hour long webinars I think I've ever done because people are really in a place of panic and what I'm coming across is emotions of disbelief, incredible sadness, huge anxiety, frustration, and people are holding this emotion. And they're not really processing it well, which is impacting then on sleep, happiness, relationships, as we said earlier.

And I felt that I'm pretty sure that you guys are on your own frontline dealing with, you know, animals will still need the veterinary care and attention that they, they, they've always need, but you'll be dealing with the human consequences of their owners being stressed, angry, scared. And so I'm sure that you guys are experiencing, and you, you'll be dealing with the human stuff, won't you, of, you know, our worries about our own mortality, fear as an emotion, worries about whether people we love will become poorly. Frustration that what looks like, inadequacies in, in, in some of the stuff that seems to be happening.

And so I felt that this was a very appropriate emotion, and it is one that It's nice to be done lying down, and so I felt it was quite important to Record it tonight. So, you can either do it sitting up tonight or we can do it, lying down if, if any of you would like to get into a supine position. So I'm just going to slide over to get the record on and, working.

And then we'll start. So if people can get themselves into her, she's got such a face on her, that girl. As you look at the girl on my slide, I do find myself wondering what what emotion that is other than just sadness, but I spy a bit of crossness in there.

In there too, so with no more ado, if we can get ourselves comfortable, dignified if we're sitting up and dignified if we're lying down. A meditation on difficult emotion. So if we're in that comfortable position, Just allow your eyes to close.

Either fully Or partially. But that's so often with. Mindfulness-based meditation.

Just bring your awareness, escort your awareness to your breath. For just a few moments. And switch that noticer part of our brain on.

And notice the sensations. Of your breath as It comes in And it leaves. Paying attention to the sensation of air.

Entering your nostrils. Your chest and your belly. Gently rising.

With each inhalation and Gently Automatically almost falling. With each exhalation. Bring that mindful attention.

So that as the air flows back out of the nostrils. We notice The sensations. Particularly noticing the sensations in your body now.

Especially the Touch and pressure. Where your body comes in contact. With the chair Or the floor Perhaps your back against the back of the chair, take your concentration.

Yeah And slide your concentration to your arms if they're on the armrests. And then your feet on the floor. And notice the external sensations.

Of the position of your body. In the chair Or on the floor. It's almost like.

Looking at ourselves from our observing self. And the internal sensations within your body. Encompassing your breath.

Finding a heartbeat. The very pulsation. And vibrations of your body.

And sit with that. And allow it Maybe rolling your shoulders back. Generally.

Making space for whatever we find. And now just recall. A mildly difficult sensation or situation.

That's occurred in the last few days. A row or a difficulty or a sadness. For a surge of anger.

And recall for a moment in your mind's eye what happened. Now, on that curious scientists stance. And just peer in.

What were you thinking? At that time. And most importantly, What were you feeling?

And now expand your awareness to your body. As a whole, While you recall the emotion that was present in that situation. Notice now.

In this present moment. Where that emotion. Is occurring in your body.

And using your mind's eye. Deliberately and on purpose sweep your body. Slowly Soothingly Smoothly from head.

To town. Stop him When you sense a little tension. Or discomfort.

Particularly if that tension or discomfort is linked to the emotion. That has arisen. And now just choose a single location in your body.

Where this emotion is expressing itself most strongly. Maybe it's a point of muscle tension. Or maybe it's an ache.

Very often we feel this in our tummy. In our throat or in our heart. But it can be anywhere in the body.

Just find where that emotion. Is sitting Linked to what occurred. And what's showing up in this present moment.

And now In your mind Just incline. Gently Towards that Spot in your body. Where the physicality of that emotion is sitting.

Continuing to breathe naturally. But allowing the sensation. To be there.

Just as it is. If you wish. And I like to do this, just place your heart, your hand.

O your heart. As you continue to breathe. Allowing the gentle rhythmic motion of your breath.

To soothe your body. And should you Experience a sense of being overwhelmed by emotion. We can manage that mindfully by just take your attention back.

Anchor your attention to the breath once more. And stay with it. Until you feel better.

And then return to the emotion. Now allow yourself to soften. Into your body where you feel the emotion most strongly.

Let the muscles Wherever that is, just soften without a requirement that they become soft or they become relaxed, just let. The muscles in that area soften. Like they do when you apply heat.

The soft muscles. Perhaps quietly just. Soothing that part of your body.

Soften Just soften, soften. Allowing your muscles to soften around that area. Bringing that mindful awareness.

But what you're not doing is making the situation or the sensation go away. You're making space and allowing. You're letting the sensations of discomfort stay.

But you're soothing yourself. And directing a sort of warm. Emotional kindness to wherever you feel that difficult emotion.

Maybe if you can. Take that hand that was over your heart. And place your hand where you feel.

That's emotion. Feel the warmth of your hand. Soothing.

Comforting. Now, Just send your out breath. To the part of the body.

And you feel the difficult emotion. Directing the outbreath there. Just quietly soothing.

And softening whatever is there. Abandoning the wish to make it go away. We don't need it to go away.

We can mindfully make space and allow it to be there. Perhaps just Saying the words. The loudest.

Just allow this, because it is just emotion. It is just those pains. I can allow this.

We're softening. And with soothing. And we're allowing Using those three words like a mantra.

Just rolling them around in your mind. Soften So Hello. Just staying with these feelings.

Softening Soothing Allowing I'm getting that sense that Later on tonight or tomorrow? If we encounter difficult emotion again. Perhaps we don't need to sit down and do the whole.

9 10 minutes of the meditation. Perhaps we can breathe. Quietly find where that emotion is sitting.

And soften So. And And whenever you're ready, Very slowly. Just open your eyes.

Gently turn back. To this. Present moment.

Well done. An emotion Meditation. Well done, everybody, I recorded that live, so, .

We actually have the recording of that one. And, I'm doing another one of the webinars tomorrow, the NHS frontline ones and, you know, I'm gonna cheat and use that one tomorrow because I think it's a, It's a really nice meditation. It's a really helpful meditation, and I do like the fact that what we can do now is that we can soften, soothe, and allow and meet emotion in that much more mindful way.

And perhaps, as part of that. Deal with those stressful communications. Using the mindfulness of empathy, honesty.

And assertiveness. So, thank you all. So much for joining me tonight.

I'm just going to go on to the chat function because we've got, I normally overrun, don't I? But we've got, 5 minutes actually. So, if anybody's got any thoughts on how we might help each other, that's always so, so useful.

Well, thanks, Louise. Yeah, no, I enjoyed that. And, yeah, it's great to have, People from other countries in as well.

So that's that feels lovely. So we've got people from Scotland, I think Portugal. We've got people from all over and it's just a nice thought that You know, during these difficult times we are meeting together and And Helping each other out, I think it's so important.

So, Yeah, the last look at Little Miss Grumpy's face. Yeah, and Have lovely, lovely rest of your Sunday night. Ah, this is a nice one here from Catriona which I'll share.

I'm listening to Brene Brown reading Braving the Wilderness yesterday, and these words really struck me. Strong back. Soft front, wild heart, yeah, I like that.

Who's that Brenne Brown braving the wilderness. I'm gonna have a look at that. Because I'm, I'm, I'm also reading a lot at the moment and taking the opportunity to, you know, seem to have more time despite being busy.

And so strong back, soft front, wild heart. Thanks, Katrina. That's lovely.

And thank you all so much for, being part of tonight. I will, save that meditation. It is saved actually, but I'll format it as well as I can.

And send it to Dawn. So when she sends the presentation out tomorrow or something, she can also send out the, emotion meditation. And I'll just see somebody else just come in.

Yeah, it really helped. I'm gonna come back to this meditation, yeah, through the week. Thanks.

Yeah, that's why I thought, I, I never used to record these ones, but I've just started to record them over the last few weeks because it's, I've got a way of doing it as we, as we meditate, and that seems to work. So thank you all so much. Have lovely evenings and, yeah, see you next week.

And look after yourselves and and others. Bye bye now.