And good evening everybody on this glorious Sunday. A very sporty Sunday as well. There's been all sorts happening today, so, and the sun is shining.

And yeah, it. It, it really is, it really is just, just lovely. And while we wait for people to keep coming in, I'll just.

Sort of I think try and explain the, the name of this this meditation today is called Taking the willingness stance and Dawn and I were. Talking earlier about actually how. It almost feels like apart from some more very minor changes really.

They feel minor now, is that it won't be long before we're back doing face to face consultations. It won't be long before the doors are sort of opening properly and you know, there is a sort of sense of getting back to normal. Despite the fact that there is still a level of threat out there.

And I think it makes getting back to normal for people really. Quite difficult, you know. And I think it is a time when we will find ourselves, struggling.

And this stance, the willingness stance, can either be seen as a Well, as a stance, or it can, as we're going to do today, be used as a meditation. I really like using it as a meditation in order to sort of familiarise yourself with the VINA willingness stances. And I'll take us through and just explain it in a minute.

And The meditation is aimed at assisting us to shift from a stance where we struggle against our internal experiences, and I always call this experiential avoidance. So that might just be where, you know, we're in a situation that we've chosen to be in, and the struggle that we find ourselves in. Is because anxiety is showing up, resistance is showing up.

I wish that we were doing something different is showing up and. What this does is it moves you to a stance of just accepting. Those internal experiences, and you might call that, that's the willingness really.

And when you explore willingness as a concept. As a rule of thumb, willingness is always to be found in the present moment, whereas struggle usually involves invoking the future. And the past.

So if we're actually in the process and in the moment doing something, the chances are that we've already found that level of willingness. Struggle comes when we stop and we worry about what might happen or when we find ourselves struggling with. The memory of stuff that has happened.

And so We start by using all four steps whenever we engage with the willingness stance. But eventually, when you've been using this approach for a little while, what you find is that you can just skip to just one or two of these steps. And what this does is it assists you to flip your willingness switch to the onstage.

So what I mean by this is, literally, we get very quick at going, No, I just need to be willing to have this stuff, but act in a manner that takes me in the direction I want to be in. So Before we do the actual meditation. If you just do me the, the grace of just letting me explain it a little bit.

So If you imagine, something that you, that might make you feel quite uncertain or quite anxious, but it's something that you really sort of want to be doing, a nice example would be, When we're asked to make a, to do a talk, or when we get asked to, attend a meeting or speak in a meeting, or when it's the first time that we're going to go back to face to face consultations with the owners of the pets and the animals that you work with. And, What we need to do in that first moment there is just stop and get in touch with why you're actually doing this, you know? What valued goal are you working towards right now?

Now, In a moment we're going to do it. Looking at what sort of why you're here with me tonight, but where this works really well is when there is something coming up that we would. In a heartbeat, run away from.

But in running away from it, it depletes us and it demeans us as human beings because. The thing that we're doing is important to us, it matters, and it matters that we do this thing. So the VINA stance suggests that before we even.

Engage with whatever it is. An example might be, . An ex, I'm terribly flattered by this, but an an ex, client of mine who was about a 15, a 15 year old young woman.

Who did therapy with me for quite a long time because she was in a very dark, dark place, has asked me to be her. Officiate at her wedding. And I've got to tell you I'm dreading it.

And, I have found myself thinking of excuses and reasons why I can't possibly do this, but I'm going to use the VINA to allow me not only just to get through it, but to be the best I can be. And that's what this is about. So step one, As I will do on the day, is we just remind ourselves why we're doing this thing and what valued goal is it that this is taking me towards or taking us towards.

And then I need to remind myself when I'm actually doing it to make sure that I'm in the present moment and the way I can do that is by using my breath as that anchor. You know, the way I can do that is by using my body as an anchor, breath and body. Step 3 is being right in the moment with any physical sensations that are actually occurring.

Noticing and labelling any thoughts, any feelings. And any urges such as the urge to escape. And Sitting with them and holding them with a degree of curiosity.

So as I'm As we're engaged in this. Action that takes us towards who we want to be. We are scanning.

We are aware of our thoughts. And what we're really doing is we're aware of our thoughts, our feelings, our urges, as they are, not as our fear brain or our anxious brain will convince us that we are. And the final step is acceptance or allowing.

And that's where we allow ourselves to have the physical sensations, the thoughts. The feelings, the urges. As they are Without needing to change them or act on them.

And this is where we really begin to find our superpower of. Mindful curiosity. You know, and it's that mindful curiosity that takes us to the final stage of the willingness dance, which is that acceptance of the experience.

And it's then that we can actually start to enjoy. What we're doing Get into it properly, but I just find this to be one of the most useful stances for the anxiety of doing something that. Feels difficult or scary or challenging for us.

So I'm hoping you will find it as useful as I do. So before we go into the actual willingness stance, meditation. The VINA process it's sometimes called.

I think the best way to do it today is to use it as part of a sort of reflective process for what we, together as a group tonight are finding. As part of our collective mindful experience. In tandem with the webinar that and dawn, so.

Let's meditate. So if we Just do a bit of a wriggle. And a bit of a shift until you find.

The position that you're going to be able to sustain for about 12 to 15 minutes perhaps. And we just Find that position and. Have a look at it.

And do I look dignified, as well as comfortable, cause we need both. And if we pull ourselves into that position of dignity. Bring that superpower of curiosity again and.

Just check your shoulders, your back. Your lower back, your seat. Notice whether you can sustain.

This physical stance that you've gentled yourself into. And if you can just get a sense of the room. Around you And congratulate yourself.

You know, it's a warm sunny night in June. And you've chosen to Explore mindfully. And this is a real gift to self, so.

Let's just find that quiet applause for you. That acceptance that yeah, I'm doing something good here. And We just start By Getting in touch With why are you here?

Tonight, why am I? Sitting here Meditating tonight. Why am I sitting?

Or lying in the position I'm in. What's that about? Well Value goal.

Or goals are you. Working towards now. Is it that Valued goal of living my life.

With greater peace and Happiness Is it The valued goal of building my mindful practise. So that I can live more moments and feel more joy. Is it because mindfulness?

Allows me to keep moving. In a life direction that Matters to me. And am I Doing this Engaging in this activity tonight.

As part of Somebody else in my life that I value. Am I doing this to be A better vet. A better human A better husband, a better wife.

About a parent. And is it all of this stuff? As we sit and we just Explore that.

We use that wonderful. Nonjudgmental curiosity. Why am I doing this?

What's it about? How is doing this? Moving me towards.

Who I want to be And as we find the answers. As we connect with these truths. As we get a sense of being on this journey, this life journey.

That can be mindless automatic. Or can be Deliberate Mindful Curious Choice driven We just get that sense of. A fork in the road of life.

Noticing that one fork. May pull us away. From this journey In a really good direction.

And the other thought for. Takes us Very firmly. Towards a much brighter better place, a more peaceful place.

A more Curious place, a place where more joy. Habituates. And then what we do If we deliberately.

And on purpose. Move into this. Present moment.

And we do this initially by just paying attention. To your breath And we Follow each in breath. And each out breath.

We try and attach our attention. Anchor our attention. Just to the bra Breathing in.

And exhaling. It's Wonderful. And we stay breathing.

And we Stay nonjudgmental. And should our mind go wandering While we Choosing to Focus on our breath we smile. And we quietly say no, no.

This is in the moment with my breath. And we might even chuckle. As we gently.

Escort our attention to the breath once more. And we take one more deliberate inhale. And one more deliberate mindful.

Exhale. And we switch our. Attention there And we Deliberately on purpose.

Switch on that ability of ours. To notice and label. What we find.

If we take our attention. To physical sensation. So what's occurring?

In this body of mine. As I sit on this warm evening. And I meditate.

And scan the body. Noticing what you find. And labelling it.

Accurately. Just some heat, just hate. Warmth There's warmth.

As my breath and my chest rising and falling. There's perspiration. There's a rumbling, tummy.

It's a slight tightness. In the shoulders. And we're labelling what we find.

In our physicality. And now we Just stop. And our job now is to Just notice and label.

Any thoughts? And he thoughts that Push their way in So we don't let go of them immediately. We label them.

There's my worry. About Making a bad impression. That's interesting.

As my Thought about what I'm doing after the meditation tonight. As a future thought Let's just sit. And as thoughts.

Float by like leaves on a stream. Let's reach in and Pull them out and Label them before we. Toss them back into the stream.

And let them go. Just watching. And labelling Thoughts as they come.

And as they go. And let's go look for feelings, emotions. Emotions are the vehicles that.

Carry our thoughts. So what emotions. Are sitting there His curiosity.

There's anger There's a bit of a resentment, maybe. Maybe there's fear. As avoidance.

And we'd label it just like. With the thoughts and the leaves on a stream. We pull these emotions out of the stream.

And we look at them. And we are curious about them. We label accurately what emotion this is.

And we Just let it back into. The stream And now I'm gonna ask you to notice and label any urges. To control your inner experiences right now.

And we just sit with those. And there's the urge to be. Inconspicuous.

There's the urge to plan. There's the urge to make what is. Right now different.

And our job is to just notice this stuff. And to label it There's my urge for inconspicuousness. There's my urge for perfection.

As my urge for reassurance. And we moved to the final. Part of this willingness stance meditation.

And we go and find acceptance and allowing. So let's allow ourselves to have. All of the physical sensations.

The thoughts. The feelings, the urges. Exactly as they are.

Without needing to change them. Or act on them. And Let's try and bring A gentle curiosity and openness and compassion.

To these inner experiences. Welcoming each one of the experiences that we're getting. As though it were a visitor.

To our guest house. We let him in And we are hospitable towards them. Knowing That they will leave And let's lean into.

Any of the difficult emotion. Leaning into it rather than Shrinking back from it. That's effectively Drop Any sense of struggle.

And let's just sit. With what it is That we might find. Seeing thoughts.

As just Constructs of the mind. That light leaves on a stream. Like clouds scudding across the sky.

They come They linger awhile. And they go Noticing that they are just made up. Of words And pictures Just words and pictures.

That our mind sends us. They're common. And go And as we Find Willingness to just allow And to be comfortable with what is.

Just notice that you're willing to switch. Is now on. We have dropped struggle.

We have dropped resistance. We are just trusting. And the truth of life that Stuff comes And it goes As we stay in this present moment.

Just allowing ourselves to sit with. This wonderful willingness stances to be with what it is. Letting go of struggle.

Finding a sense of being liberated. Truly liberated. I'm not struggling more.

By just having what is. The willingness stands. Well done, everybody.

I've sent Dawn a handout of the willingness stance. That with a bit of luck, she'll be able to send out with the recording. Or As a, as a, it's I think it's a word yeah it is, it's a word document just called Taking the willingness stance.

I think this is a really powerful, powerful meditation, and it really fits where we all are, you know. I went on a train down to London yesterday, and a lot of people weren't masked up. And yeah, it felt really uncomfortable, and I wanted to get off actually a couple of points and just said, you know, should we not go today.

But I was going to see my daughter and she kind of matters, you know, and so, . If I'm guided by my values. We sit with it, don't we, and we find the willingness to do what we do because it takes us towards who we want to be.

So once again, thank you all very much for joining me tonight. It's really lovely to know that they're, we're meditating together. I love it.

And Go out and enjoy the, I think this is one of the loveliest when you've had a sunny day and it's just beginning to cool. But it's warm enough to sit out. And just let the sun go down, it's a bit of a special time, isn't it?

So, We've got the long evenings at the moment which are a joy, you know, and mindfulness allows us to live them more, doesn't it? So let's go live them more. Thank you very much and see you in a month's time.

Bye bye now.