Hello and welcome to today's webinar. And this is Doctor Mike Scanlon, and many of you will know me have done a lot of work with the webinar vet and done lots of work over the years with the veterinary profession. And today's webinar entitled Thriving as We Return to Normal Functioning.
Is really looking at a very. Interesting conundrum that we're all in, which is that we've been living through. A global pandemic.
As a species, we've been, faced with this, long lasting. It feels like sometimes never ending level of threat that has really impacted on our assumptive world. And what I mean by that is that we all had assumptions pre-COVID that this is how the world works.
This is how governments govern. This is how individuals deal with stress. This is what my life looks like.
And to some extent, the COVID experience has. Dropped a stone onto this mirror and shattered many of those assumptions. And then Over the last year and a half we have very gradually.
Created a new assumptive world, the world that was living with the threat of COVID, where our working practise changed, and we very quickly, as humans do, assimilated to this, and we created this new assumptive world that I don't have to meet people face to face. I. Meet people and when I do, I wear a mask and I wash my hands way more than I ever did before and.
Our expectations of each other and our expectations of our clients, and our expectations of ourselves and the job we do. Have all changed. And now it feels like the new, new assumptive world is that we're gonna have to get used to new COVID variants popping up from time to time.
And We will move to this new assumptive world, which is from time to time. We will increase our vigilance. To remain Virus free.
We will take extra precautions. But I don't think we'll ever. Go back to that full lockdown state.
So we are Returning to a new. Assumptive world, a new normal functioning and as we do that. That causes stress all of its own and it brings anxieties because we've kind of got used.
To the way that things have worked and in many ways. We have become Safer? I know that sounds mad, but it's true, isn't it?
Because we don't find ourselves in the same situations as we did before. We have been seeing less people. We have been taking more precautions and.
As we move back. And things begin to transition again. There is going to be a surge of anxiety, and for some people there will be a reluctance to return to a previous state of functioning and how things were, although things never ever in truth ever go back to exactly how they were.
And what we want to do is to have an opportunity. To gradually. Move on from this experience and maybe even achieve what some people call post traumatic growth.
And that is where we move forward in our lives, in our professions, and we look back. And we look forward. And we recognise.
Changes we recognise new things that are important, and if at all possible, we start to. Make some gains, you know. And make some new learnings about ourselves and our jobs and find out what works now and.
Keep that going. And let go of the stuff that doesn't work, but it's all change, and human beings, we just don't like change. Now when you look at my first slide and you see the axe sitting there, we wonder, well why has Mike stuck an axe up?
And that's because as we move forward and we start to thrive again in this new assumptive world. We will only thrive. If we hold on to the truth that you can only ever separate the mind from the body with an axe.
Because the mind and the body are. Inexorably linked. And If I take that sup of water.
We just get that sense that, yeah, . There's going to be bodily changes. As well as emotional, psychological changes to be made.
And so We are looking at normal functioning will entail us managing this at a psychological, emotional level, but also. Bearing in mind that our body Has also been part of this journey and this change and this switch from assumptive worlds to new assumptive worlds, and we take into account the importance of ourselves as a whole holistic being. So My proposal is that we use this webinar today to.
Help provide you guys with a toolbox. Of effective living. And this is effective living.
In the context of. Coming out of the pandemic and moving forward again and learning to thrive and my honest Appraisal of this is, is if we move forward with psychological flexibility. And this means recognising that we have choices.
Always we always have choices, sometimes just one or two choices and sometimes a myriad of choices. And if we go forward embracing that sense of choice in these various different aspects of our life, we can really, really thrive. Taking anxiety.
And the symptomology that goes with it and. The physicality that goes with it. Along with us as part of the journey.
So I'd like to provide you guys with some tools for. These various areas. So if we start with values and purpose and meanings.
I'd like us to look at that and let's look at some tools to help us. Manage that sense of. Reconvening with the new values that almost certainly.
Will have arisen in our minds because COVID has changed a lot of this stuff. It has put us back in touch sometimes with the stuff that really matters. It's reminded us of how important work is.
It's reminded us of how important our colleagues are. It's reminded us about how important home is. How important life is.
It's put us back in touch with the stuff of life that really matters in many cases. And Moving back to this normal functioning, our brain can sometimes see that as a threat to this new values. Life that we're living.
And In terms of a contact with the present moment, whenever we make changes, big changes as human beings, we find ourselves losing contact with the present moment, and nearly all anxiety that Manifests itself in human beings tends to be, anticipatory anxiety, worries about stuff that hasn't happened yet. So we're gonna look at some mindfulness tools to be in that present moment. And we'll look at that as part of today's webinar.
And we're gonna look at the importance of active openness to experience change without that sort of pull away, you know, because as we pull away from this stuff, we. Let our amygdala and our fear centre and our brain know that we're scared. And if our amygdala senses that we're pulling away, or we're withdrawing, or if we're avoiding, and there is no openness to experience, then the brain will send us feelings, thoughts, emotions linked to anxiety.
So it's finding a way to be open. With this change process. And I'd also like to share some tools that might help you manage the thoughts and the emotions that will start to push their way into our consciousness.
Allow us to see thoughts for what they are. Products of the mind that come and go. And we'll look at that.
And provide a toolbox. And We're going to look at which self. Because there are 3 selfs.
There's the observing self. There's where we Step away from ourselves and we look at ourselves and we say, what are you doing? And why am I doing that?
There's the self in actuality, which is. When we realise that. Right in this moment now I'm not scared, I'm not anxious.
I'm actually just functioning. I've almost forgotten that I was worried about. A return to this aspect of the job.
And then there's our conceptual self, which is very often where our negative beliefs about self sit. Very often these were engendered from childhood or adolescence. And this, we need to make more use.
Of the observing self because it's by engaging with the observing self and realising what is actually occurring in our lives that allows us to deal with stress so much better. And we need to actually Move Towards what's most important to us by taking committed action. To Meet this challenge of this new assumptive world with curiosity rather than.
That pull away. Fear response. So Let's explore.
How we're going to do this. So over the years, the last couple of years with PET scans and FMRI. Functional Mirror imaging technology, we are beginning to recognise that the brain.
It is clever. But the brain is also. Potentially very unhelpful.
And if we only deal with the stuff of life from a place of. Threat Then It's very negative, and there's never. Never reward from engaging with threat.
There is only escape and relief. But no reward Now as the slide says here. We all have the ability to harness our superpower of curiosity.
And that's a, that's the stance, I believe that we need to take with us into this. New world of ours, you know, because as a slide says. By simply Choosing to move into a situation that is new and potentially scary or threatening.
And to find a sense of curiosity can actually shift us neurologically speaking, out of that place of fear. And into the search for connections. And As that bottom paragraph suggests.
The moment that we start to deal with difficulties and potential threats with genuine curiosity. We Engage with a part of the brain that allows us to benefit from reward chemistry. And This is actually reinforcing, and as the slide suggests, it's as satisfying and reinforcing to the brain as a pay rises to our willingness to work.
And so all of the strategies that I'm going to share with you today are grounded in an attitude of curiosity. This is the superpower that I want you to harness as a result of today's webinar. So Have a think to yourselves for a few moments.
Have there been changes? To your values, and by values I mean the stuff of life that matters to you. As a result of the COVID experience.
Think about it, yeah. Are there people? That you've reconnected with and value differently or more or less other aspects of your life.
That have become More important to you that matter more as a result of the COVID experience. Have you Made spiritual changes. Have you found yourself in a place where you are valuing a new spiritual sense of self, for instance.
And maybe what we need to do is recognise. And be curious about whether or not Some of the anxiety that you may be feeling as we return to What our politicians would state is back to normal. Although I would take issue with that as we return to that so-called back to normal.
Many people are already beginning to feel anxiety of potential loss. And if we are curious and we look at our lives and we look at the stuff of our lives that really matters. And we stop And we truly make a commitment that.
The COVID experience has taught me. That this person in my life. Really matters and pre-COVID maybe I was taking them a bit for granted.
We begin to recognise that we have missed people and missed aspects of our work perhaps. And We feel a sense of anxiety that as we come back. Will we ever get back to that?
And we worry about it. And what I think we need to do. Is we need to sit down.
And we need to speak to those people that are close to us, and we need to agree. Do you know what, as I move back to this new normal. What What aspects of my valued life do I want to maintain contact with?
We don't want to cling to them. We just want to make a commitment. To continue valuing them.
And what aspects of my life? That I've missed Can I re-engage with as an important. Value That I want to re-engage with as I move forward.
And if we Meet this with curiosity. And if we make a plan. That actually I can do this, you know, and I can go back to work, holding on to these values that.
I feel anxious about losing. And we Lean into this with genuine curiosity, and instead of fear that curiosity shifts to a solution focused response where we are able to find reward from finding solutions. So I will.
Go back to work. Maintaining this closer connection with the people I love, and the way I will do it is by finishing work. Resetting my brain before I walk into my home.
And making sure that I leave work where it belongs at work. There's just a suggestion of how we might do that. So Very simply, in your toolbox, let's think about.
A real effort to continue to live a values consistent life and in doing so, our anxiety. Well Begin to diminish and our curiosity and sense of reward will begin to glow. And to grow Now for many people, When we are faced with yet another change.
Instead of meeting it mindfully. We engage with it. In a Very interesting way.
Whereby we find ourselves overfocused on what might happen. Overfocus on where might I be with this in a few months' time? What could happen as I go back to work?
What might occur. And we maybe even meet some of that stuff from a place of dread. And I want you to imagine for a moment, and it helps with this if we kind of play.
And if you grab hold of an imaginary steering wheel. And you imagine driving. Along a very long, very straight road.
And All that you're thinking about and all that you're focusing on is way, way, way in the distance. There's a hill. And the only thing you're focusing on is what if there's something dangerous or difficult when I drive over that brow of that hill.
And we are focusing so much on. What is awaiting me? In that unknown place that I can't see yet because I need to go up the hill and down the other side before I can get there.
And as we drive With our focus gimletted with dread. To our future Perhaps recognise that you're paying no attention. To the scenery around you.
You're not Enjoying or embracing or engaging with the ride. At all. And if you imagine how the brain perceives that it's a bit like if you stood up at the moment and leaned forward with straight legs you would wobble.
And this is what happens to your brain. If you allow yourself to leave the present moment. And get stuck.
Because you will wobble. And the simple solution is to pivot yourself back to the present. So Similarly, if you imagine you're driving your car and you park up the car and someone puts a carpet over your front windscreen and rips off your side mirrors and says to you, you can.
Go forward if you want to now, but the rule is. The only way you can judge whether you're getting where you're going right is by looking in that rear view mirror. And if we all crane our heads up as though we were looking in the rear view mirror.
And seeing what's behind us, but unable to see. Any sense of now or what's what the road has for me in this immediate moment now. And we think about driving forward.
That's right, it feels scary. It feels very difficult. Our shoulders and arms and legs become tense, and we undoubtedly expect that we will crash the car.
And so with the same perspective, if you guys going back to work. Overfocus on what might happen. And you get stuck in a sense of trepidation and fear about your future or you get stuck with.
How it used to be in the good old days. You will keep crashing this car of life. And a way to Help us to recognise.
And come back to the present is to use this technique called pivoting. And I've made a short film which I will send as an accompanying resource, but I'm just gonna talk you through pivoting at the moment. So If I ever catch myself worrying about stuff that hasn't happened yet.
I will Perhaps sit On a chair with a nice straight back and I will Pivot my body forward into a lean. And I will keep on going lower and lower, bringing my head towards my knees. And I will notice that as my head comes towards my knees, my shoulders end up somewhere up around my ears and there's discomfort.
And I will acknowledge that. And I will acknowledge that this is the same as anticipatory thinking. That I am now Out of A sense of being centred and I'm in front and leaning into the future too much where it's become uncomfortable.
And then I pivot back. And I begin to take my body back. And back And back Until I am once more.
Back in A present position where my back is straight and there is no lean. And that's exactly what's happening to the brain. And so sometimes, by adding a bit of physicality in, we can move from that place of future dread.
And pivot back. From the present. Back to the future.
Similarly, we can lean back. On our chair until it becomes uncomfortable. As it would be as if we were over focussing on the past.
And we can pivot forwards, forwards, forwards, forwards, until we are sitting strong and present and centred once more. So pivoting. Away from being stuck in the future or the past, pivoting back to this particular moment puts us back in touch with the only place, you know, as humans that we can ever experience joy or happiness.
Is in this present moment. And we owe it to ourselves. To take the opportunity of seeing life as it really is.
Not as our brain wants us to believe it was. Or could be Especially when that Was or could be is linked to a sense of fear. And dread So pivoting, let's place that in the toolbox along with.
A focus on Values and the stuff that matters. And The next thing for our toolbox is about being willing to see things as they are. And this very much is about self.
You know, and it's about the willingness to sit with, with difficulty. Rather than to move straight away into avoidance stances. So one way.
To mitigate that desire that most humans have when anxiety shows up, which is to avoid. Which actually, as I'm sure you can imagine, just causes in the long run, more anxiety and a definite lack of confidence in our ability to deal with. Anxiety and worry.
So Sometimes what we can do. Is we can practise labelling what is actually occurring in this moment. Not what our mind is telling us is occurring.
So imagine that. You are returning back to client focused centred work, and you are terribly anxious about re-engaging with. The general public.
More than you have been. And in the middle of a consultation with an owner or a colleague or a client, we find ourselves, falling into a trap of believing that, oh my God, I'm making such a fool of myself. And Then smiling and labelling what is actually occurring.
What's actually occurring here is that I am A bit anxious But I'm not making a fool of myself. I'm just curious and engaged. So we label what is actually occurring rather than what our mind.
Tells us is occurring. And the other thing about willing to stay. With anxiety without Always adopting.
A An adverse push away stance. Is to remember The ring metaphor It really helps. So there's this king And he's in charge of his country.
And all around him, he is besieged by threat. And for many of you guys, going back into practise and re-engaging with this new assumptive world, it will feel like there is threat everywhere. Threat of the, the new and unknown, threat of the new variants, threat of getting things wrong.
You know, threat is everywhere and so we like the king are surrounded by this threat. And after a while, because the king does nothing with this, just keeps batting it away and pushing it away, he starts to get terribly, terribly anxious. And the king calls us all the wisest people in the kingdom, and he says, You give me a gift that will take away this anxiety, and give it to me now.
So the wisest men rush around and they give him, beautiful consorts to spend his time with. And they give him Money to spend and to buy things with. And They give him self-help books to look in and find ways forward, and none of it works.
And the king calls the wisest old woman and says, What are you gonna give me that might help me? And she reaches into her pocket and he gives him this rather manky old. Bronze ring.
And she says, sire, wear this, she says, look at this ring and wear it, and it will really help you. And so he sticks it on his finger and he almost thinks no more of it. And then He realises that nothing is working for his stress, so he thinks about the old woman and her dreadful gift of the ring, and he summons her back to the kingdom, and he shouts at her and he says, Your ring has been absolutely useless.
You told me it would help with my anxieties and my worries, and it's done none of the, none of the sort. And if you don't give me a better present, I will have you beheaded. And the old woman doesn't look flummoxed at all, but she smiles at him and says, I, do you remember I said to you, have a good look and wear the ring.
Did you have a good look? He says, well, not really. So have a good look now, sire.
And he takes the ring up and he looks at it closely. And what he finds is written on the ring inscribed on the inside of these words this too shall pass. Great, isn't it?
And as long as we remember. That We stay with difficulty. We allow anxiety.
We open up and we accept it because of the truth. That what is anxiety provoking now won't be in a few moments. Because we are dynamic beings as humans, and life changes and circumstances change, and our response to difficulties changes.
So of course this too shall pass. And we will deal with whatever happens. I just love that.
There's so much truth in it, you know. This too shall pass. No In terms of our thoughts, remember for a moment that emotions are the vehicles that carry the thoughts, but the thoughts.
Are what usually dictate our scared, angry, anxious behaviours. So A thought and an emotion. That become entangled becomes quite a powerful force.
And so we need to work in a way that allows us to work with both emotion and cognitions or thoughts. So Let's think about thoughts. And fear thoughts.
First of all, let's just think about the part of our brain that kind of sends us those emotions and carries those thoughts. And it's pretty much the amygdala. Yeah, our fear centre.
And the problem with the fear centre is that very often because it tries to help us by making us react. Almost before something happens, so it's super fast. It's so super fast that it gives us misinformation.
You know what it gives us is total misinformation because it's trying to get us to respond to threat before the threat has even arrived. So because of that, much of what it sends is not accurate, is not helpful, is misinformed, and very often palpably untrue. So let's explore that.
So guys, I want you to imagine that the webinar finishes and you get a text on your phone from your bank, and it's got all the correct logos. It looks like it's a bona fide text from the bank. And it says, unfortunately, a A hacker has hacked the bank's internet.
Provider And what you must do immediately by return of text is text us all of your. Security information that keeps your account safe. Because once we have that information, we can secure your account for you.
And I pause and I wonder how many of you out there would immediately do exactly as you were told and. Divulge all of your security information and data protection, passwords, etc. And my guess is almost none of you.
Would actually do that. And so I stop and I ask you, well, why not? Why is that?
And you say, well, Mike, I would never do that. I said, well, why not? And you say, because, well, you know, I know that would be a really stupid thing to do cos this is probably some hacker somewhere just trying to steal from me.
So I say, well, so a hacker. Is spamming you to try and make you behave in a certain way, from which they will benefit. You say absolutely.
And I said, OK, so in that moment there you used your critical thinking skills. You used your knowledge as a historical human being. You used your common sense, your nous, your street smarts.
And she very quickly within a millisecond. Made a choice that actually, do you know what, I choose not to buy into that, that thought, that worry. And so maybe.
When we find ourselves worrying about stuff that hasn't happened yet and worrying about others might think of us. And when we find that we are bombarded by thoughts that want us to act, usually in a, escape or avoidance pattern to get away or try not to have anxiety. We need to remind ourselves that we have this.
Curiosity superpower and we need to use it by just becoming curious as to. Do you know what, I wonder. If my brain is spamming me here.
Is Trying to make me believe that threat is there when actually maybe it isn't. Thoughts of spam. And sometimes When the vehicle that carries the thought.
And the member of the vehicle is a motion. When that vehicle overwhelms us and we can't think clearly, and we have a very personal thought like everyone, nobody's going to be pleased. That you're returning to work.
Let's take that thought. Nobody's going to be pleased that you're returning to work and the emotion of fear and doubt and possibly even, guilty feelings about. Perhaps not being in work.
When those feelings Attach themselves to the thought that nobody's going to be pleased to see you back at work, then that thought takes on, it, it magnifies and becomes bigger and more powerful, and purports to be powerful enough to make us choose and make choices that will never work for us. So let's look at a strategy for dealing with that, and again, I will send a film as a reminder of how you do this one. So I call this the 5 stage diffusion process.
So Step one is we stop. And we smile and we breathe. Step 2.
Is we recognise. That right in this very moment. My mind wants me to believe that no one is going to be pleased.
To see me back at work. And we count 123456789, 10. And stage 3 we recognise that a few minutes ago.
My brain Decided it needed to convince me that nobody was gonna be happy to see me return to work. And we notice a sort of curiosity creeps in, really. Gosh, I wonder, I wonder if that's true.
Let's have a look. I now count 123456789, 10. I create more distance between myself and that thought.
And I say to myself, as I got to 10, I entered a brand new moment in my life. That's just true, isn't it? And we say in this new moment.
Mike Scanlon Is realising That his fear brain has been trying to convince him. That no one will be pleased to see him return to work. And then we step back and we look at that and we say.
Am I actually going to buy in? To that thought Because that thought no longer feels quite as real as it did. 2 minutes ago.
And maybe it is just a thought. That is accompanied by what is just a feeling. And you heard me use a phrase then.
Buy into. So the third strategy with thoughts is I call it the broken vase strategy, and you'll guess it, I made a film of this as well. So we imagine that someone we like very much, says, you know, you've been so brave during COVID that I've, I've bought you a present, and I've bought you this present, and I hope you like it.
And you unwrap it, and it's the ugliest vase you've ever seen in your life. And you look at them and say, how much did this cost? And they say, well, I spent 100 pounds on it, and you say, good God.
And they say, do you not like it? And you say, well, actually it's really ugly. And they say, yeah, but ugly things can be useful, and you take it to the tap and you fill it with water, and it's got a hole in it, and it leaks and it's chipped.
And then you look more closely at it, and it's lined with, toxic asbestos. And you look at the person that's brought you this and you say, I don't think I want. To be bought this, I wish you hadn't bought this for me because It has no worth, it, it, it has no usefulness, .
And the person says, don't worry, it's the end of the world. I'll tell you what I'll do is I'll buy you a replacement. And let's see if that's better, and they actually ask you, what do you want me to buy you for 100 pounds, and you say, well, a new pair of running shoes so I can get fit.
And they say, will that be worth having, you say, absolutely. And so they take the broken bars back to the shop and they replace it. Because one is worth buying.
And the other one isn't. And sometimes if we catch ourselves buying into. Thoughts, feelings, emotions, behaviours that We would never Buy for 100 pounds, or if we imagine our friends.
Being offered That same thought or feeling or emotion or behaviour. For the price of £100 we would say, gosh, no, not at all. This is a worthless thought.
This is a thought that has no merit to it. I absolutely do not want to buy into that thought. And the rule is, with this approach, replace it.
So the thought That no one's going to be pleased to see me has no worth. It does nothing for me. I wouldn't buy that thought for 100 pounds, so let's replace it with something believable.
And true That is less anxiety provoking. So it's true The Not everybody will be overjoyed to see me again when I return to work, but the people that really matter to me. Have already told me that they can't wait for me to be back because I enhance the workplace.
Now would you buy that thought for 100 pounds? Absolutely every day of the week. And this is what we call a thought replacement strategy.
And it's almost labelling, that's a broken vase thought. You know, it has no merit, it's ugly, it's worthless, and it pollutes. My life, so I no longer buy into that thought, but I don't leave it there.
I take the time to replace that thought with something that I'm willing to buy into. Yeah. And essentially guys.
What really works is. Shifting our focus in a very structured way and you've guessed it, there's a film for this one as well. And this is positive psychology.
Stance. And with this stance, what we do is we shift the focus to what goes well. So each day as we return to work.
For 1 week only, we finish our day off and we write down 3 things that went well. And then we ask ourselves, and what was it about me that caused that to go well? And we write that down.
And then we write, so what does that mean about me as a vet? As a dad, a husband, a friend, a man, a woman, what does that mean about me? And we engage with it.
So instead of. Focusing on negativity and worry, we deliberately on purpose shift our focus to what goes well. The causal reason it went well, i.e., what was it about me, made that go well.
And we finish with, and what does that mean about me? And we connect with a more positive, vibrant truth. About South Now We talked about those different selves.
And if you can use and apply to your toolbox, the bold strategy, which is literally where. You. Make a little pact with yourself.
That as I return to work whenever I stop. To actually stop and get myself a drink. And take a little pause to drink that drink.
I'm going to do a bold. So I've just got myself a drink and I take it as I'm doing right now. There it is, and I take a breath.
One breath. Lovely. And then I move into my observing self and I relax and I look at how I've been.
In the recent past and how I am in this recent moment. And in that moment as I look, I lean in with that superpower of curiosity and I say, have I been? Behaving, thinking.
Acting In a way that I like, in a way that takes me towards the man I want to be, the woman I aspire to be. And if we find as we lean in. That, oh, you know, I really like that version of me.
We move to the D and we warmly say. This is great. Let's have more of it, please.
And sometimes when we bold, we will move into the observing self, and we will lean in and we will say, oh my God, look at me. I've been avoiding talking to everybody all day. I've hardly made any eye contact with the people at work I like, and I've been rushing everywhere.
Like a a a headless chicken. Is that the me I want to be? Decide Now this is a mindfulness in action strategy, and it works.
And this commitment to what works and what my suggestion is, is have a look at your toolbox that I hope I've just added to. Of mindful, acceptance, wise approaches to managing anxiety. And give them a go.
And if Engaging with them enhances your life. Do more of it. And if you can highlight the stuff of life that depletes your life.
Try and do less of it. Because it is all about the mindfulness of what we do that works for us and the mindfulness of what we do. That maybe worked for us once but no longer works for us any more.
Because the mindful approach to stress and anxiety is not to rush away from it as though we were. Almost thinking about, you know, the Hammer House of Horror film where we. Sort of roll back the coffin lid and Christopher Lee is lying in the coffin looking all handsome and a bit kind of pale, and then his eyes open and he smiles at you and we see his fangs, and we recoil from it, and we desperately try and shut the coffin lid.
Perhaps what we want to do is we want to lean into that coffin, you know. And we want to smile and say, good God, how curious, how curious am I about? How, how have you managed to lie in that uncomfortable coffin for the last 1000 years?
Good God, that must have been difficult. So we bring curiosity and compassion to our experience. We move into it rather than recoiling from it.
And with practise. We moved to the great. Place where instead of always reacting.
We Have the stimulus that. Can Bring the emotion that carries the thought that engages the behaviour. And we can meet that mindfully.
And if we meet it mindfully, we will always find. That there are at least 2 choices to every situation. And in the time it takes us to realise that what was a reaction has become a response.
And the great Victor Frankl, one of my absolute heroes from history. You know, if you get a chance to read, in search of meaning. It's just one of the best reads ever, in my opinion.
And Frankel, remember, he was in that Nazi death camp, and he learned that to react was dangerous, and to react all the time would mean that he would lose his sense of self. And so he wrote in that great, great book. Between stimulus and response, there is a space.
And in that space is our power to choose our response. And in our response lies our growth. And our freedom.
And everything that we've done today. Colleagues has been about. Finding that space.
And responding in a way that takes us towards the human being we want to be. And my final slide is about making sure that you don't engage with my webinar today, and then move away saying, do you know, I can't do any of this right now because life's a bit too busy, but as soon as the practise gets a bit calmer, I'm gonna start doing some of this stuff that that might bloke bangs on about. That won't work.
We're prevaricating and procrastinating. In the same way as if we arrive at a station to take us on a train journey, and there are 2 trains. One of them is an old clapped out East Midlands special.
And the other one is the brand new, Aviva line, beautiful train. And it's just the most gorgeous train. And that train has a buffet car.
That serves Egon Rona style food. And the other train, has a couple of machines that still, that sell, stale Kit Kats. And we're all gravitating towards the gorgeous train, cause they're both going to the same place.
And we asked the guard, can you tell me please, when does that rubbishy train leave? And he says, oh, yep, leaves in 3 minutes, and you say, thank you. I think we're gonna get the lovely train, but can you tell me when that one leaves?
And he says, well, it, it's gonna leave soon, but we want it to be stress free. So it will leave when we know that all the conditions are perfect for it to be the most gorgeous, stress-free, relaxed, enjoyable ride ever. And you're intelligent people.
And my guess is, all of you. Are picking up your cases and jumping onto the. Creddy old train.
Because you know, That that train might never leave the other one. Because if we wait for conditions to be perfect before we make change. We never make change.
So, I hope you're able to use what we've done today. To find what works and use it. Thank you so much for spending some time with me, and I hope you found.
Today's Webinar around this transition into this new potentially scary world, useful. Thank you very much.